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השבוע נתקלתי בטקסט שכתבתי לעצמי לפני כמעט חמש שנים ושממש הפתיע אותי.
זה היה מעין חזון לחמש השנים הקרובות שנכתב בספטמבר 2021 (בסמוך לראש השנה).
לא זכרתי שכתבתי אותו בצורה הזאת, והיה לי ממש מסקרן לקרוא אותו.
ככה הוא מתחיל:
"בעוד כחמש וחצי שנים, בפברואר-מרץ 2027 אשתי ואני נהיה בני 55.
ילדינו יהיו בני 27, 25 ו 18.5, הגדולות משוחררות אולי תוך כדי לימודים ו/או עבודה,
הצעיר כחצי שנה לאחר סיום התיכון, במהלך או לקראת שירות צבאי.
קייטי החתולה שלנו תהיה בת 8-9 ומייקי הכלב בן 6.
איך נראים ונחווים חיי בנקודת הזמן הזו..?
אני כותב את הדברים הללו מתוך ידיעה עמוקה וברורה של שתי אמיתות חשובות:
האחת – אין לי מושג מה צופן העתיד.
כל מה שאני כותב פה יכול להתרחש או לא.
בכל רגע נתון חיי יכולים להשתנות בצורה מהותית ולא צפויה.
הדברים הללו נכתבים בענווה גדולה.
אני אפר ועפר.
השניה – לדברים שאני כותב יש השפעה גדולה.
החיים הם יצירה שמתהווה עכשיו, בהווה, בכל רגע ורגע, ואני היוצר שלה.
ליכולת שלי לצייר ולייצר לעצמי ולמשפחתי חזון , לראות ולחוות אותו, לבחור בחירות ולעשות פעולות שמקדמות אותי לעבר החזון הזה יש השפעה עצומה.
העתיד נוצר בהווה.
אני היוצר של יצירת חיי."
**
מדהים שעברו כמעט חמש שנים.
זה מרגיש כמו לחזור אחורה במכונת זמן, ולהתחבר למה שכתבתי אז,
אבל מתוך הכרות עם העתיד (שעכשיו הוא עבר או הווה).
מצמרר לקרוא את המשפט "אין לי מושג מה צופן העתיד",
שנכתב כשנתיים לפני ה 7.10.23.
במהלך השבוע הקדשתי קצת זמן לסקירה של חמש השנים שעברו,
והתחלתי לכתוב לעצמי מעין סיכום של האירועים המרכזיים שהתרחשו ושחווינו.
יש הבדל גדול בין לסכם שבוע או חודש, לבין לסכם חצי עשור.
כשמסכמים חמש שנים מקבלים פרספקטיבה רחבה יחסית,
ניתן להבחין בתהליכים ובהתפתחויות לאורך זמן.
אירועים מסוימים שהיו נכללים בסיכום שנתי או רבעוני,
מוצאים עצמם בחוץ בסיכום חמש-שנתי.
מבלי להיכנס לתוכן ולפרטים, אני רוצה לשתף בתובנה מרכזית אחת שהתחדדה לי:
במבט ראשון, תשומת הלב נמשכת לדברים הגדולים והמרכזיים שקרו במהלך התקופה הזאת.
זה יכול להיות ברמה האישית והמשפחתית או ברמה הלאומית והגלובלית.
והנה התובנה:
לא פחות חשוב ממה שנכנס לסיכום הוא מה שלא נכנס לסיכום.
לדוגמה: אם חס וחלילה חווינו אובדן או מחלה קשה במהלך התקופה,
ברור שזה יהיה חלק מהסיכום, אבל במידה ולא חווינו משהו כזה,
לא בטוח שנסמן "בריאות תקינה" בסיכום תקופה.
ואם לא נסמן לעצמנו "בריאות תקינה", אז כנראה שגם לא נעריך ונחגוג אותה.
כשם שבשיחה חשובה עם אדם אחר,
חשוב להקשיב גם למה שנאמר וגם למה שלא נאמר,
כך גם בהתבוננות על החיים,
חשוב לשים לב למה שקרה וגם למה שלא קרה.
שבת של שלום,
חיים מלאים,
רוני ויינברגר